When I was first married, I bought a strand of pearls. Not because I like pearls or could afford pearls, but because I thought it was the thing to do, now that I was a married woman. (I also had a faceful of piercings, it was a confused time). The thing about those pearls is that I always, (nearly ALWAYS) act like a lady when I have them on. Some weird placebo effect.
I wish that we all had some sort of talisman against bad manners (some ideas: twinsets, kitten heels,
Mary Tyler Moore hair; for the gentleman: a silk kerchief or ummm, golf shoes?) Of course, people can’t act appropriately if they were never taught. So the generation raised on talk shows (people interrupting others) or electronic applications (can operate in underpants) may not immediately realize the effect their inadvertent gaffes might have on their elders and/or those of us who were given Emily Post’s book upon “womanhood”. Yeah, really.
Manners and treating people right – It’s a two way street. Interestingly, companies that have an advanced ATS, diversity awareness and comprehensive talent strategy often overlook the simple things that can make talent feel comfortable:
- Can I take your coat?
- Is there a place we can meet to discuss?
- Thank you for coming in today.
- Please fill out this application and someone will be down shortly to assist you.
- We’ve chosen another very qualified applicant. We appreciate your participation and wish you the best.
And then there’s the talent/candidate side. I did hope I would not have to pick on the (ahem) talent. But I wanted to ensure that you (precious lifeblood that you are) understood the, um, issues behind a superstar becoming a DUD. These are real life situations and should be taken very seriously. Candidates have the following responsibilities when it comes to manners/common sense/acting like a human:
- Do not ask your boss for a 4K loan, particularly before the months mark, no matter how close you feel
- Do not falsify time cards if you are a 1099 employee
- Work a forty hour workweek if that is what you are being paid for
- When the boss calls you on the company cell, don’t ask, “who’s this?”
- Do not get hammered at company events and embarrass the company
- DO NOT TAKE AN INTERVIEW IN A LOUD LOCATION OR WITH THE WINDOW OF YOUR KIA SEPHIA DOWN
No matter how talented or competent you may be at your job, there are things that are manners (some might say ingrained integrity but let’s not go there now) based. Learn these fairly simple, somewhat global, rules of how to treat people and you will go far (whether client, candidate or recruiter). Believe that your professional merit lifts you above such petty nonsense? Don’t be so sure…
I pity the fool.
Hey Maren, since I have been labeled at the “HR Techinician” I am going to play that role in this comment. There is no such thing as a “1099 EMPLOYEE”. If they are 1099 they are a contractor and have no “rights” under the FLSA. If they are an employee they do and you have to treat them differently. So eliminate that phrase from your HR lexicon. They are either and employee or they are not. Mixing the two gets you in trouble.
I guess I need to learn how to “technician” if I are going to be one.
Hi Maren,
I think manners need to be reinforced more now then ten years ago. I feel that people think they can do no wrong. The media teaches way too many young adults that loud and naïve behavior is appropriate in the working environment. I think my biggest pet peeve is personal cell phone conversations at the office. (You know the ones where everyone can hear what you’re talking about). I’m no angel myself but work is for the work place. If I want to let it all out and act crazy I head out to the ball park and watch my favorite baseball team kick butt. At least there I can say whatever I want. Ha ha. Thank God for our weekends!
Cheers.
Maren – About.com update their top 10 job boards list here:
http://jobsearch.about.com/od/joblistings/tp/jobbanks.htm
Do you think its nessecary to be on all of them if you want to find a good job?
Last week, I was bussing home (that’s right…I’m green) and the dude behind me was clearly on the candidate side of a phone interview. At first, I was thinking, “You’re actually doing your interview on the noisy bus?” But, after hearing his side of the conversation, just before I got off the bus, I handed him my card. We’re chatting on Friday.
Is it rude to poach a candidate in the middle of their interview with another company?
Great post.
It’s true that we can’t use good manners if we don’t know what they are, or have never had them modeled for us. This has always been true; it’s not a new thing.
There are models all over, however. Observe the people who are most successful and most liked, who you’d like to be like, and do what they do.
If you’re still confused, here’s a great model of good manners: Jessica Fletcher on “Murder She Wrote.” I’m not kidding! I never watched this show but the other night someone in my house had it on (Lord knows why) and I started watching. Lame plot, weirdo hairdos. But Jessica has amazing manners! Really! She is dignified, warm, tactful. You could do a lot worse than to emulate old Jess.