Yup, it’s true. I really just don’t like most recruiters. I know it’s a cut throat business and I’m sure most recruiters are nice people in real life, but I still don’t like you. Hey, don’t get mad at me, I tried to like you, but like a bad relationship, it always ends the same way – with you making empty promise after empty promise leaving me holding the bag. But since it’s the holiday season and all, I thought the least I could do is give you the gift of feedback and list out all the ways that you annoy me. It’s for your own good.
- The Script – When you call me it takes all of about 3 seconds to realize you’re reading words from a script. Look, I know the person on the other end of the line is probably just out of school, but when the first thing I think of is a telemarketer interrupting my dinner, that’s not a good sign. If you’re going to use a script, at least practice the damn thing a few times in the mirror before you call me.
- You Called – Yeah, about the calling me thing…what is this 2000? There are about 15 different ways for you to reach me online and you thought the best thing to do would be to call and leave me some half assed message. Do you really think I’m going to call you back? There are about 5 people who I routinely speak with on the phone…even my mom texts me. If you want to engage me, engage me in a place where I’m likely to engage you back.
- The Perfect Candidate. – This is my favorite one. Let’s say you actually get me on the phone and you tell me all about this great candidate you have for one of my roles. Then I say great, send them along to me and I’ll have a look. Then, all of a sudden, the perfect candidate doesn’t really exist. Thanks for the bait and switch.
- You Don’t Know S#%t about my company – I hate this one the most. You pitch me on a candidate with great experience doing whatever from company X. Uh, if you knew anything about my company, you’d know we rarely hire from company X and that skill set doesn’t matter at all to me. Next time, ask me a few questions before giving me the hard sell.
The reality of being inside a company is that we will need to use recruiters to fill certain roles. I use them now. But what I’ve learned over the years is that the best recruiters out there are the ones who really take the time to understand their clients and what’s really going on within the company and only send me candidates who fit – they don’t send me people just to send them. I’ve always had much better success in working with a few select recruiters, helping them get to know us and happily giving them more business.
Andy Porter is Chief People Officer at the Broad Institute of MIT and Harvard in Cambridge, MA which means he works with some wicked smaaht people. Some days, he indeed does wear short shorts around the office(call it a morale booster) but it really just makes people uncomfortable. Other days, he spits some mad game on cheese. No really – he’s somewhat of a cheese aficionado. But more importantly? At Broad he gets to his small part to help change the world of healthcare.