Holiday parties are tough for me because I struggle with alcohol.
I am a petite woman, so it’s tough for me to hold my liquor. It just takes a few sips before I start to feel buzzed. Once I start drinking, my judgment is off. I forget that I can’t handle liquor, and one glass becomes a bottle. One bottle can become several.
Knowing this about myself, I try not to drink at holiday parties. I’m never as charming as I think I am, and I don’t want to be the person crying in the bathroom at the end of the night.
When I worked in human resources, I was able to avoid alcohol by policing the workforce. But now that I’m out of HR, I don’t have any excuses other than trying to stay sober because I care about my physical and mental health.
And sometimes that excuse isn’t enough.
I had my first, epic drinkathon at my husband’s holiday party in 2012. His company wasn’t doing well, his CEO had just resigned, and I wasn’t in the mood to deal with the anxiety of another holiday season. So I went to the holiday party on one condition: I need to have a drink in my hand the entire night.
My sweet husband granted my wish, not knowing the depth of my dependence. That was the night I invited myself over to another employee’s house, unconsciously stole the remaining wine from the party, and fell on my ass and bruised my tailbone after the event.
You can dress me up, but you can’t take me out.
Holiday work parties are terrible for people like me who are trying not to drink. Some of us barely make it through the season with our dignity intact, and the forced-fun of a party only makes it worse. And, while not everybody is a functional alcoholic like me, some people don’t wish to participate in the season’s festivities for personal or cultural reasons.
So, if you have a holiday party, make it something work-related while people are getting paid to be there. Be sensitive to those who would rather spend time doing something else. And, if you serve alcohol, also serve delicious food.
What’s better than champagne? Nothing. But I’ll gladly distract myself at your holiday event by shoving tasty snacks in my mouth. Keep the hors d’oeuvres coming!
Laurie Ruettimann is a writer, speaker, and entrepreneur based in Raleigh, NC. She’s working on her next book about fixing work due out in 2020.