“Whose permission are you looking for? Go do your thing…Nothing is going to happen unless you do something . Quit that f**king bull***t job; you can always get another job.”
One of the videos that has inspired me over the last weeks is this short rant from Gary Vaynerchuk. Watch the entire thing — it’s only 1 ½ minutes. That being said, I know way too many HR pros that are tired, feel taken advantage of, or simply need a new adventure. When I speak across the country, many talented people admit to feeling stuck. Here are some tips I’ve learned along the way to help get un-stuck and move on.
- Don’t wait for “permission” to quit. I stole this from Gary Vee (see video above) but it bears repeating. We’ve been groomed from a young age to wait for others’ permission to act. Others include our parents, our teachers, our bosses, our spouses, hell – we ask permission from our children. Our CHILDREN. If you are miserable, you don’t need anyone’s permission to take steps to be “un-miserable”.
- Know your mental health is worth more than money or job status. Learn from my BIG life mistakes. I’ve had many experiences with work and relationships where I simply held on for 6 months too long. I didn’t have the courage to quit or leave despite everything in my soul telling me to leave. My self-respect took a big hit and it was devastating.
- Begin to disconnect. No matter how good the “culture” or location or “purpose”, hear me loud and clear: THERE ARE OTHER COMPANIES THAT WILL OFFER YOU THE SAME QUALITIES. Oh, and have bosses that treat you well
- Take advantage of December to network. Networking groups have holiday parties, lower key luncheons, and mixers. Go. Meet people. Why? Not to get a next job asap. But to realize there are more people like you with great jobs at other places. This helps you disconnect (see bullet point 3).
- Do not take advantage of the people you are networking with. Do not expect anyone you’ve just meet at a networking event to get you a job asap. Do not expect a person you only know as a “fan” to put down everything to help you. What you can expect is to learn, get advice and SHARE advice. If you form an authentic connection and find you have similar philosophies and can offer others something in return, you now have a reason to reconnect later. The “reconnection” is where your “job-hunting” can begin.
- Don’t feel guilty about networking for your new job while working at you current shitty job. Karma is a bitch. If your boss has been treating you terribly, taking you for granted, ignoring you, paying you poorly, or freezing you out – then they have it coming. Disclaimer: you still have to DO your current job. I mean, show a little dignity and integrity in the process.
- Search for a job while you’ve got one. If you can stand it, and your mental health can stand to wait it out (despite your awful boss) a few more months, search for a job while you’ve got one. It’s practical and less stressful on the family.
- Get clear on what you want to do next. Most of you like what you are currently doing, you just hate your a**hole boss. Then the decision is easy. Keep on keeping on! However, you may want to get clear on what you LIKE to do best in your current specialty area. This makes deciding who to network with so much easier.
Last, but certainly not least:
Practice saying “Screw This S**t” with no disclaimers. HR people are too nice sometimes. It’s ok to be mad about your current situation. It’s ok to take care of yourself before your team, the employees you like, or your customers. If you find yourself going through “pros vs cons lists” more times than you can count, just say “Screw This S**t” and move on.
Have the courage to bet on yourself for a change. You won’t regret it.
Dawn Burke, VP of Talent Consulting at Kinetix and founder/advisor for Dawn Burke HR, is an HR leader, speaker, and writer specializing in new HR practices, engagement and workplace culture. Her HR/recruiting/leadership career has spanned the last 20 years, with past gigs including a foundational role as VP of People for Birmingham, AL’s award-winning technology company, Daxko (And yes, Kris Dunn and Dawn are making Bham the HR capital of the world! Who knew?). You can also check her out at DawnHBurke.com and a variety of other interesting places. Google her, it’ll keep you posted on what she is up to.
Most importantly: She is addicted to TV, knows most of the lyrics to Hamilton and West Side Story, loves to cry at movies (check out Cinema Paradiso for a cry fest!), thinks wine, a wheel of Brie and Milk Duds make a well-balanced dinner, and sings in her car daily. Her husband and cat are the Yin to her Yang.